Dating for runners
Dating for runners - 14th November 2021
A running friend once told me that you should never date a non-runner. That's all very well, but as we all know, there are several different types of runners. Here are ten questions to propose to potential partners.
There's no right or wrong answers, but they should be revealing and save your future relationships from strain.
- You've just got in from a run. What's the first thing you do?
- Upload your run and analyse the stats in detail
- Jump in the shower, but not before hanging all your dirty running clothes over doors so they dry out before you put them in the laundry (which you'll definitely remember to do later)
- Your running watch battery dies with half a mile left to home. Do you:
- Not worry about it
- Upload a manual "missing miles" entry
- Go out again in the car and drive half a mile, crawling along as slowly as possible so your "run" doesn't get flagged
- Cry, because the run is ruined
- Best post-race refuelling option:
- Energy gel
- Slap-up meal
- Eleven beers
- You're out for a run and get stuck waiting for traffic to pass so you can cross the road. Do you:
- Stop your watch and stand there looking annoyed
- Leave the watch running and stand there looking annoyed
- Jog on the spot to prevent cooling down
- Race the traffic
- It's New Year's Day and you've woken up with the worst hangover ever. Do you:
- Go back to sleep
- Eat lots of greasy food and try to rehydrate
- Go for a gentle jog to clear out the cobwebs
- Go for the parkrun double
- You've injured yourself running and the physio insists on three weeks with no running. Do you:
- Accept your fate and just take it easy. You probably need a break anyway
- Eat healthily and cross-train to maintain as much fitness as possible
- Run on it anyway. What do physiotherapists know?
- Walk around irritable for three weeks while eating junk food
- You're out running and see some other runners you recognise from local events. Do you:
- Wave and say hello as you pass
- Ask if you can join them for a run
- Speed up while trying your best to look like you're putting in no effort at all
- Do you record your runs in:
- How many pairs of running shoes do you own?
- One pair
- Two pairs. It's good to rotate them
- Two pairs of road shoes and a pair of trail shoes for muddy conditions
- Two pairs of road shoes, a pair of heavily-cushioned shoes for long distances, two pairs of flats, a pair of super-light racing shoes, trail shoes, cross country spikes, three pairs of track spikes (for sprints, middle-distance and long-distance), generic field event spikes (in case you get asked to get a point for the club between races), a pair of old shoes with screws in the soles for when it's icy outside, and some shoes that aren't really running shoes but you wear with casual clothes just in case you need to run anywhere unexpectedly.
- You're not going out tonight because:
- You have a race tomorrow
- You have a race in two days
- You have a race next week
- Your 6-month training plan starts tomorrow
You can invite me to your wedding :)